Offended, Inability to form meaningful relationships, Stony (impenetrable to the word of God and wise counsel), Calloused, Unable to love genuinely, Lacks empathy, Incapable of making a sound judgment without being overly emotional
Broken, Unhealthy heart
Issues of life can leave our hearts broken and unhealthy. The state of the world adds fuels the fire because we are surrounded by so much negativity. If we aren’t careful, our hearts can become molded by outward carnal influence instead of positive spiritual influence. The things we experience can shape our perspective and hinder our ability to love. I know this all too well. I’ve experienced plenty of heartache in my life. Some time ago, I found myself wounded and in a place, I thought I would never be in. As a result, I became leery of people. I didn’t want to be involved with anything that involved connecting with others. This was unlike me because I have always been a very relational person. Yet, I found myself putting up walls that would ensure that my heart would be safe from any future trauma. I began to push people away and categorize them. I stopped sharing intimate parts of my life and was very careful about who I communicated with. For a while, I was so overtaken by my emotions that my responses were quite impulsive and I was unable to make sound decisions void of my feelings. It was a slow fade. The process started inwardly and gradually seeped into other areas of my life. I lost interest in anything that involved people. I decided to focus solely on my family and my immediate circle. There was no longer a desire to invest and build any other relationships. In my mind, it became obvious that the general standard of loyalty differed greatly from mines.
Throughout this process, I felt a spiritual disconnect and I knew the reason why. I had allowed my hurt to change my heart. Also, I had left room for anger and other unhealthy things to come in. I knew I had to do something.
What did I do? I went to the Father and laid it all on the table. I was honest about my feelings and the state I was in. I told Him all about my hurt and how I allowed it to change me. I also had spiritually strong friends who helped me navigate through my emotions and to share my heart with. They held me accountable when I didn’t want to forgive and address my issues. It became ugly at times but I had to get my healing. I began to pray Psalm 139:23-24, ” Search me, O God, and know my heart: try me, and know my thoughts: And see if there be any wicked way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting”. I had to give the Great Physician permission to perform open-heart surgery on me and the work started. He began to show me the state of my heart. It was worse than I thought. I knew the only way for me to restore its health was to do my part and be transparent with the Lord. I also had to keep my mind on good and positive things. Constantly, my spirit was fed the word of God and I continued to speak it over myself until my heart began to change.
The Prognosis (Outcome):
Heart issues can greatly affect our relationship with God and spiritual growth. Sometimes, we can be unaware that a problem exists. Therefore, we must constantly ask the Holy Spirit to reveal those deep, hidden things to us. Once revelation occurs, we have to willing to be honest and take responsibility for our role in our own destruction. Since then, I have continued the internal work. Although I am not quite where I would like to be, I am grateful for the progress made. I want to have a heart that is malleable to the word of God and full of love. I want to be able to freely give of myself without reservation and think clearly. Currently, I am still recovering. God is answering my prayers daily and my healing is continuing. I am getting better and learning a lot about myself as a person. Most importantly, I am growing in my relationship with Him.
Friends, our Father knows what it means to be broken. Our broken hearts aren’t a surprise to Him. Psalm 51:17 tells us that He will not despise our broken and contrite hearts. He invites us to come and bring our brokenness to Him so He can heal us to wholeness. When I think of our Father waiting on us, I envision a surgeon in His surgical attire who has just scrubbed in and put His gloves on. He is standing with hands up ready for us to lie down on the table. Once we lie down in humble submission, the work begins. I can see the nurse, the Holy Spirit, in the room. He is passing the Father all the right instruments to get the job done and monitoring our vitals as well as our progress the entire time. Don’t you know that the Father is ready to perform open-heart surgery and remove anything that is stopping our hearts from functioning the way He intended? He wants us to love the way He loves and be free to experience the fullness of Him.
Our God is the one who heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds (Psalm 147:3).
Let Him Do It For You! Get Your Healing!
@ 2019 NiaCara Lawrence